Dive into the Heart
That is the name of song ^^. It is a simple chorus, but the music grows, and the context where it plays make you look into you heart and question youself, and when the music gets to into you can't avoid facing the darkness inside your heart, are you up to it?
Once again using the definition where darkness refers to something bad or evil, and light to a good thing, I shall tell you what I saw. Past a see of thoughts and feelings, guided by the pumping sound, I found it (not that it was hard, I know well where it is) lying on that empty space, majestic and strong. I couldn't help to be shocked at what I saw, I think it was fair given all that I have been through, but even so I can be shocking when you actually face the darkness in your own heart.
I never imagined it could reach this state, and yet, it may seem that the darkness is little for some people, and it is, but for me this level was unexpected. Many scars ran from one side to the other, some deep, but most shallow, each one covered in darkness, and I knew that behind the darkness was a unprotected wound that wanted to bleed. Interesting to notice that the darkness, the evil part of your heart is actually a powerful healing force, strong enough to protect your wounds, and give them time to heal. The social consequences of this are bad since whenever someone wanders too near your wounds the darkness tends to attack and hurt anyone so close, with so much evil flowing in your heart you have more tendency to be evil(obviusly), witch is something I rather not.
The heart still had its glow, wherever there wan't darkness a blueish light glowed, vividly, showing that my heart was doing its job, and was basicly ok. After some time I could see, deep inside it, that little golden glow, a tiny sphere in the depths of my heart, the things that will never change inside me, what defines me, what should be remembered when my name is called out. But then I saw, a sad tear rolled down me cheek, this should never have happenned. A wound so deep, it actually touched the golden sphere, I knew I was different, something wasn't right, I lost something important, the drive, it was it. The golden light was resisting bravely, fighting back the dark wound, I thinks someday it may win, but for now I'll be walking less of myself than I've ever been.
I guess it is for the best the way darkness has grown, I'd rather not have, but in these conditions it is better, it helps me not getting more wounds, but it may hurt people I don't want to, and as a sign of the darkness, I can't avoid thinking that some people, not generally speaking but some specific people, deserve to suffer, somewhat I can't help the desire to see them in pain, but not gratuitous pain which is useless, but a realisation pain, that in which you feel the pain you have caused, and strive to be a better person, and cause less pain to others.
You see how letting the darkness grow can be a bad thing?! But this is the darkside, I am too much of a goodside to hurt, seriously hurt, anyone. Besides the light is still strong in my heart, but serves to warn now, if I ever hurt you, remember it may not be because I want, it probably is just my defensive system.
I feel the pain
I feel the sorrow
many many tears
dried for tomorrow
Inside the darkness
a pure strong glow
of a innocent heart
letting hatred flow
I can let it go away
I need the shield
protect me the next day
the evil guides me
if you don't want to help
then please let me be.